happy friday!

There comes a moment between the conception of an idea and the fulfillment of said idea when one must pause for another crucial step in this process and ask oneself – Is this actually a good idea, or am I insane?

If you want my opinion (of course you do), the makers of this product skipped that step.


And I get it, really, I do. Hey guys, instead of putting Ovaltine or Hershey’s Syrup directly into the milk, let’s just give the kids these magic straws that makes it all chocolately! They’ll be all like, Ooh, it looks like plain milk but it’s actually chocolate! Great idea, right? Am I right? Wrong. Make the damn chocolate milk yourself!

What if you use up all the magical cocoa beads the straw is lined with in just two slurps of milk? Then what happens to the rest of your 8oz glass of milk? Or what if you like your chocolate milk to be super chocolately? Do you drink from three straws simultaneously?

Am I the only weeping for my childhood? I loved squirting an obnoxious amount of Hershey’s syrup in my glass and then watching the colors meld to create my very personal glass of chocolate milk.

These packets were found in a 4′ deep bin at the Walmart Super-center in Yuma, AZ.

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