happy friday!

And in today’s edition of useless shit you will never need but idiots continue to sell…

No human is immune to kitchen gadgetry – there is always something we’re convinced we need to make our domestic lives a little easier. Not to say this is totally unfounded. For as much as I laugh at apple corers, I bet it helps people who make copious amounts of apple jam and an enviable number of apple pies. Same goes for cherry pitters. I’ve become pretty attached to my jamming kit, even though I don’t really need 3 of the 4 things it came with.

What I’m saying is, I get it. I get having a few nifty crutches in your kitchen – things that perhaps you don’t need but hot damn, have they made your life easier! What’s more, I applaud the ingenuity of the person who saw the problem or gap in the market and said, hey! I have an idea/design that would be totally helpful in this situation.

What I don’t understand, however is the need for something like this:


I mean. Really? REALLY?! Who, pray tell, is this helping? The Von Trapp Family? People who have a driving need to make perfectly circular pancakes in sets of four? There is a greater chance I will walk a tight rope across the Grand Canyon than there is of this piece of crap actually producing “picture perfect pancakes every time.” What ever happened to, oh, I don’t know, using a PAN? Sound unfamiliar? It’s that contraption with a round surface that is quite possibly cowering in fear at the back of your oven. You know what you won’t get from this Perfect Pancake Pan? Crispy edges. If that isn’t an integral part of your pancake experience, well – what have you been doing with your life?

And that’s not even nearly enough maple syrup, Perfect Pancake Pan.

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